The path to consciousness can at times be confusing. If you wish to live in the flow, you must fully embrace everything there is. Let go of your resistance to all that feels uncomfortable. This is the road to happiness and freedom, according to the books on spirituality. But how is this with longings? Does this mean I am no longer allowed to focus my attention on the future? I can no longer develop longings? No longer have the wish that things be different from the way they are?

Nelson Mandela had a great longing for the world to be different from the way it was. He focused on the future, a future which he profoundly wished would be free from apartheid. His deep longing was the motive for all his actions, the core of his entire spiritual being. Does this mean Mandela didn’t live in the now? Did he fail to accept the current situation as it was?

If anyone was able to embrace the now, with all its pain, he was it. Accepting doesn’t mean giving up, but rather being at peace with the reality. It means acknowledging the reality as it presents itself, independent of it being right or wrong, independent of wanting or not wanting. Letting go of the inner resistance to the now. Acknowledging the facts and from there giving rise to new movement.

Being connected to the larger whole is characterized by both-and

Being connected to the larger whole is characterized by both-and. You are both able to accept the reality as it is, and you can have a longing for change. Both need to be recognised. If one of the two isn’t allowed to be, tension emerges. Life can no longer take its natural flow. If Mandela hadn’t accepted his situation, he wouldn’t have been able to survive his imprisonment in such a powerful way.

I have a great longing to be together. Together with a partner. Together with others working on beautiful projects, with others for whom I have high regard. Be part of a community. The reality is that I am alone quite a bit. Especially here in Portugal. I know many people, but I do not not always feel connected to them. Which sometimes feels empty and at times very lonely.

When I completely accept this fact, this is painful, but at the same time I can experience a peaceful calmness. Being present with what is, makes me experience space, transparency, and strength. Next to the raw truth of the loneliness, I feel how strong my longing to be together wants to be lived.

Longing is a powerful medium

Longing is a powerful medium. It is the source of movement, growth and change. It is the motive for creation, the energy that brings people together. It is the power that brings about new life. Enlightenment isn’t about letting go of your longing, rather it requires you to embody your longing, regardless of the outcome. And this requires courage.

What would happen when I give expression to my longing? When I let a dear one know I want a more intimate connection? When I express my wish for collaboration with others I barely know? What happens when you let the world know you want a different society, as Mandela wished for? When you let your environment know you want to work as a coach to help others? When you let your family know you want a more genuine relationship?

It could be possible that my longing isn’t equally met. That my wishes do not come true. That my needs are not answered. It is possible others do not understand your longing. That they work against you. That they reject you. It is also possible that you move others with your longing. That you make deep connections. That others support you in your longing. Now or in the future.

What happens when I don’t show my true self?

And what happens when I hold back and don’t live my longing? When I don’t show my true self? Then I block my life-energy. This affects my vitality, my relationships, my state of being. I live but miss the sparks and freshness that gives life so much colour. If I want to live life to the fullest, I will need to express my deepest longings, take along my fear for rejection, and allow there to be disappointment.

I practice. Step by step I open up the vulnerable space in my heart. I walk into walls, reside in empty spaces, and on a deeper level I meet warmth, grandness, connection, splendour, lust, silence. I am alive. I feel longing. I move.

My wish for you: that you may give expression to your deepest longing. That it makes you radiate joy. That it makes you feel alive. Regardless of the outcome.


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